Nerves and stage fright, and what to do when something goes wrong
What nerves feel like and when they peak, what has evidence behind it, a plan for losing your place, tears, a failed screen or running long, and when fear is worth taking to a professional.
- Start here: the essentials
- What nerves are, and what we know about them
- What helps, and how well we know it
- When something goes wrong
- When you may cry
- When fear is more than nerves
- See it: Lena's voice catches, Amara's backup reader
- Practice: your first minute and your plan B
- Your talk
- Check your work
- Knowledge check and scenario
Start here Essentials
For a first talk, this chapter asks you to make four small decisions on paper before the day, so that nerves have less to work on. Each takes a few minutes.
- Write your first line at the top of the first card. Then you can start without thinking (what helps).
- Practice the NHS breathing exercise for five minutes on a few days before, and again before you go up (what helps).
- Write what you will do if you lose your place: pause, look down, find the next keyword (when something goes wrong).
- If the talk may bring tears, ask someone to finish it for you and give them a copy (when you may cry).
Minimum time: about 30 minutes, plus the breathing practice. Done when: your day-of checklist has your first line, your lost-your-place plan and, if you may cry, the name of the person who will finish.
What nerves are, and what we know about them Understand
Most people feel something before they speak: a fast heartbeat, a dry mouth, shaking hands, a sense that the mind may empty. Researchers call the general condition communication apprehension, which McCroskey defined as "fear or anxiety associated with either real or anticipated communication" (Stand Up, Speak Out's section on communication apprehension (that page no longer loads), an open university textbook). The word covers a range, from a flutter before a toast to a fear that keeps a person from agreeing to speak. This chapter is about the first end of that range, with a section on the other end.
Four things are worth knowing before you try to manage the feeling.
- It is common. A meta-analysis of treatments reports that fear of public speaking is the most commonly feared situation, reported by up to one third of people (Ebrahimi and colleagues' 2019 meta-analysis). Experienced speakers feel it too; the same textbook says nervousness is normal and that good speakers get nervous.
- It usually peaks before you start. The textbook, citing a 2006 study by Witt and colleagues, says anxiety tends to be highest in the moments right before the talk begins and declines as the talk goes on (Stand Up, Speak Out's section on reducing apprehension). That is why the first line, written down, matters: it covers the worst moment. Research finding, one textbook's summary
- The audience often sees less than you feel. The textbook says audiences do not necessarily perceive a speaker's fear. It is an observation, not a promise: a shaking hand is visible to the person holding the paper.
- The body state is close to excitement. The textbook says the body's state during anxiety does not differ from its state during excitement; what differs is the mental label. The next section returns to this, and to what a replication found.
Three numbers that measure three different things
Figures about speaking fear get repeated as if they were one statistic. They are not. Each answers a different question, and we do not add or compare them.
| Figure | What it measures | Source |
|---|---|---|
| Up to one third | People who report a fear of public speaking, as summarized in a review of treatment studies | Ebrahimi and colleagues, 2019 (a meta-analysis) |
| 29.0 percent | US adults who said they were "afraid" or "very afraid" of public speaking in one 2024 survey that listed many fears | Chapman University's 2024 survey of American fears |
| 7.1 percent in the past year; 12.1 percent over a lifetime | US adults who met the criteria for social anxiety disorder, a diagnosis; the data are from 2001 to 2003 | NIMH's social anxiety statistics |
A person can be afraid of speaking without having a disorder, and the reverse. The point for a first-time speaker is the first row: many people feel this, including people who speak well.
Three claims that are repeated and do not hold up
| The claim | What the sources say |
|---|---|
| "People fear public speaking more than death." | A replication with 815 students found public speaking picked from a list of fears more often than any other, death included; when students had to name one top fear, death was chosen most often. The slogan misreads a checklist count as a ranking (Dwyer and Davidson, 2012). In Chapman's 2024 survey, dying (31.6 percent) edged out public speaking (29.0). |
| "93 percent of communication is nonverbal." | Albert Mehrabian, who produced the figures, says the formula applies only when a speaker talks about feelings or attitudes (Mehrabian's own page). Lapakko traces them to two 1967 studies with serious limitations (Lapakko's article on the urban legend). Delivery matters; this figure does not measure it. |
| "Imagine the audience in their underwear." | No study we found tests it. A cognitive neuroscientist writing in BBC Science Focus reports that speaking experts call it unwise, because respect for the audience works better and the trick may distract you (BBC Science Focus on the tip). That is expert judgment, not trial evidence. |
What helps, and how well we know it
The methods below are ordered by how much support they have and how little they cost. Each is a thing you do, with the evidence stated beside it. None removes nerves, and we do not claim it will.
Prepare, and rehearse out loud
The textbook's main advice for apprehension is to practice out loud, standing, as you will speak, and to keep going through a mistake as you would have to in front of an audience. It also says most novice speakers speak too fast, and that timing yourself in rehearsal avoids having to cut your remarks short on the day (the same section). Rehearsing out loud is the method. For nerves, it matters for a plain reason: you are not deciding anything new on the day.
Write the first line and the cues
Since anxiety tends to peak just before you start, remove the decision from that moment. Write your first sentence in full at the top of the first card. Put delivery cues such as "slow down" in the notes, and pause before you begin; the textbook recommends both. Hamilton College's guide to notecards says to write cues in a different color from the words (Hamilton College's notecard guide). Shaping a short talk covers cards and scripts. Convention
Breathe slowly
The NHS describes a breathing exercise for stress, anxiety and panic. Breathe into your belly as deeply as is comfortable, without forcing it, in through the nose and out through the mouth. You can count one to five on the in-breath and one to five on the out-breath; at first you may not reach five. The NHS says to repeat it for at least five minutes, standing, sitting or lying down, and says it works best when done regularly (the NHS breathing exercises page). The page is written for stress in general, not for speeches. Try it on a few ordinary days so that it is familiar, then use it in the room where you wait. Test it
Focus outward, and speak more often
The textbook also suggests putting your attention on the audience and your message instead of on yourself, and concludes that more exposure to public speaking reduces anxiety, so it advises seeking chances to speak. A short toast to a small table is such a chance.
Try calling it excitement, as something that may change how you feel
A well-known study found that people who told themselves "I am excited" before a speech felt more excited and were rated as performing better than people who tried to calm down (Brooks, 2014, abstract). A direct replication in 2025 found nearly identical self-reports: people who said it felt more excited, though not less anxious. It found no difference in observers' ratings of performance (Poynter and Smith Pasqualini, 2025, abstract). So we teach it as one thing to try: it may change how the feeling seems to you, and we do not promise it improves how you are rated. The two studies side by side are under Go deeper. Test it
Do not drink to calm down
In one laboratory study of people with social anxiety disorder, those who drank alcohol felt less nervous before a three-minute speech to an audience of two, and blinded raters scored their speeches worse. People without the disorder who drank also scored worse and did not feel calmer. The authors caution that effects may differ at a party or a meal (the British Psychological Society's report on the study). We read it through that report, not the paper. At a toast, any drink in your hand will do; Giving a toast covers the glass.
The excitement studies, and the evidence behind them
The original. Brooks's paper reports studies of karaoke, public speaking and math. Across them, people who reappraised anxious arousal as excitement felt more excited and performed better than people who tried to calm down. Short methods worked, such as saying "I am excited" out loud or reading a short message. The paper also notes that an overwhelming majority of people believe calming down is the best way to handle pre-performance anxiety.
The replication. Poynter and Smith Pasqualini repeated the public speaking study. Self-report results matched Brooks: more excitement, not less anxiety. There were no differences between conditions on any observer rating of performance, and none on an indirect anxiety measure. The claim that saying "I'm excited" makes your speech better is therefore not robust. Two studies disagree on the part that matters most to a speaker, and neither tested a toast or a eulogy.
Related work. Jamieson and colleagues told people to think of arousal during a stressful task as functional; they showed more adaptive cardiovascular responses and less attention to negative information (Jamieson and colleagues, 2012, abstract). That study did not involve a speech.
Systematic desensitization and what treatment studies show
The textbook describes systematic desensitization, gradual exposure combined with relaxation, and reports that McCroskey in 1972 found it "eighty to ninety percent effective." The figure is quoted secondhand and is dated; we attribute it and do not treat it as current. A newer meta-analysis pooled 30 randomized trials with 1,355 participants and found an overall effect of 0.74 (Hedges g), larger at follow-up; its authors note that self-report effects were larger than physiological and behavioral ones, and that there were signs of publication bias (Ebrahimi and colleagues, linked above). For a review of how researchers define, explain and treat public speaking anxiety, see Bodie's 2010 review, abstract only.
When something goes wrong
Most failures in a short talk are small and recoverable. The pattern is the same: stay composed, buy a few seconds, and go to the next thing you know. The textbook says your most important job is to stay composed, and that an audience is often impressed by a calm plan B (Stand Up, Speak Out's section on coping with the unexpected). Write each plan down before the day.
| What happens | What to do | Where it comes from |
|---|---|---|
| You lose your place or skip something | Pause. Look at the card. Decide whether the skipped part matters and where it fits. A few seconds of silence is less distracting than a string of "ums." | Stand Up, Speak Out |
| Your mind goes blank | Same pause. Tell yourself you have notes, and that the audience does not know the order you planned, so changing it costs them nothing. NIMH lists the "mind going blank" among the symptoms of anxiety, so it is a known effect and not a personal failing. | Stand Up, Speak Out; NIMH's social anxiety brochure |
| The screen or microphone fails | Use the backup you made in advance. Describe a chart in a sentence or two if the screen will not show it. With no microphone, speak up and face the far side of the room. Voice, microphone and the room covers the setup. | Stand Up, Speak Out; its tips on presentation aids say to have a backup plan |
| Someone interrupts, a phone rings, latecomers walk in | Pause and wait until you can regain attention and be heard. Then repeat your last sentence. | Stand Up, Speak Out |
| You are running long | See below. This one is our advice, not a sourced rule. | Our advice |
Running long, our advice
No source we found says what to do when you are already over time in the middle of a talk. What exists is advice to prevent it: aim for the middle of your slot, time yourself at least three times, and expect nerves to make you faster, so that a rehearsal that runs close to the limit will probably run shorter on the day (Exploring Public Speaking's chapter on practicing delivery). Our own method, which you should test in rehearsal, has three parts. Our convention
- Mark time on the cards. Hamilton College's guide suggests marking approximate time points, for example that you should be about halfway through by card three. Do that, and glance at the clock at each mark.
- Decide in advance what goes. Mark one middle point or story as the one you will drop. Dropping a planned piece is easier than choosing under pressure.
- Go to the close. If you are behind at the last time mark, skip to your closing line and last line. Ending on the planned close tells the room you are done and gives you a clean last line. Preference
The slot is the host's or organizer's to extend, not yours. If you have not been told, ask in advance (Saying yes).
These are common ways to recover, not guarantees. Under real nerves a plan can fail, and a pause that feels long to you is usually shorter to the room. What none of them settles is whether the talk was good; that is settled by whether it served the people who asked for it, which you can ask the host afterward.
When you may cry
If you are speaking about someone you love, someone who has died, or someone who has made you proud, your voice may catch. That is not a failure, and a short plan keeps it from ending the talk. Three sources agree on the main points, and each is a practitioner or a bereavement organization rather than a research study, so we state them as conventions. Convention
- Stop, breathe slowly, and keep water within reach. A hospice bereavement newsletter from NorthShore University HealthSystem says to stop, take slow breaths and keep a glass of water nearby (NorthShore's guide to writing a eulogy).
- Choose someone to finish for you, ahead of time. The same newsletter says that if you cannot recover, someone you have preselected can take your script and finish. One humanist celebrant's tips say to arrange a backup, either a support person beside you or the celebrant, and add that you may be more emotional than you expect (Humanists UK's nine tips from a celebrant). Give the person a copy. Tributes and eulogies says how to choose and brief a backup reader.
- Give yourself permission. The National Funeral Directors Association's consumer guide says it is okay to cry and advises practicing several times, including the morning of (Remembering A Life's guide to a eulogy). The celebrant says crying is okay, that you can speak slowly and pause to breathe, and that if you expect to be very emotional it is fine not to make eye contact; focusing on one friendly face is an alternative.
Two practical additions are ours. Read the hardest passage aloud several times in rehearsal, since the first aloud reading of a hard passage may be the hardest. And keep the pause: a catch followed by a breath and a sip of water may read to a room as feeling, and a room may wait for you. Preference
What the celebrant's tips do and do not cover. We read the celebrant's page through a summarizer first and re-read it for this chapter. It gives nine tips, none with numbers, and no research. We found no university or textbook source on crying during a talk, so the guidance above rests on bereavement and funeral organizations. Customs for what a service allows, and who may stand beside you, belong to the officiant; ask them (Tributes and eulogies).
When fear is more than nerves
NIMH describes social anxiety disorder as a persistent fear of social or performance situations, and says that in some people it arises only in performance situations such as giving a speech. Symptoms include blushing, sweating or trembling, a rapid heart rate and feeling the mind going blank. NIMH says a diagnosis requires the fear to last at least six months and to interfere with daily life, and it says to talk to a health care provider such as a primary care doctor, psychiatrist, psychologist or clinical social worker (NIMH's brochure, revised 2025).
The same brochure says treatment is psychotherapy, medication or both, and calls cognitive behavioral therapy the gold standard psychotherapy; exposure therapy, which confronts the feared situation step by step, is one form. The 2019 meta-analysis above found that treatments for speaking fear worked on average across 30 trials. Neither source says what will work for you.
On beta blockers, we give no names as advice and no doses. The NHS describes them as medicines mainly used for heart conditions that are only available on prescription (the NHS page on beta blockers). NIMH says they can help control some physical symptoms such as a rapid heart rate, sweating and tremor. The NHS says a beta blocker used for anxiety treats the physical symptoms only and that many doctors prefer medicine-free treatments such as CBT (the NHS's common questions about one beta blocker). Whether to take any medicine is for you and a prescriber to decide.
This chapter teaches what speakers can do before and during a talk. It does not diagnose or treat anxiety. If fear stops you from agreeing to speak, has lasted months, or affects your daily life, talk to a doctor or a mental health professional, as NIMH and the NHS say. If you are in distress now, call a local crisis line or emergency number. The prevalence figures above measure different things and say nothing about whether you have a condition.
See it: Lena's voice catches, Amara's backup reader See it
Lena Park (she/her), 29, will give a two-minute toast at her grandmother Ruth Park's 80th birthday dinner: a private room, 14 family members at one long table, no microphone. Her uncle Daniel Park (he/him) hosts and toasts first; Lena speaks second, after the main course.
Known: her slot is two minutes; the toast is about 260 words at her measured 130 words a minute; her first line is written at the top of the first card; the close is "Please join me in raising a glass to Grandma Ruth."
Assumed: that nerves will speed her up (her three rehearsal runs were 1:52, 2:05 and 1:58); that her voice may catch at the story of the burned dumplings. Both are her guesses, not facts.
Her plan, written in advance. If her voice catches: stop, breathe in slowly, sip water, look at Daniel, then say the next line from the card. If she loses her place: pause, look at the card, find the keyword, go on. She also marks time on the cards: a mark at the end of the story, so that she can see whether she is near two minutes.
Open: whether the pause reads to the table as feeling or as a problem (settled by the rehearsal listener, her mother, who tells her; Rehearsing out loud). Whether Daniel can be her friendly face, since he sits at the head (settled by asking Daniel).
Amara Osei (she/her), 47, will speak at her father Kwame Osei's funeral Mass. Her brother Kofi Osei (he/him) is her backup reader. A microphone is at the lectern.
Known: she has a full script in 16-point type; Kofi has his own copy of the same script, marked at each paragraph break; they agreed a signal, a nod, that means "take over here."
Assumed: that she may be more emotional than she expects, as the celebrant's tips warn; that Kofi can reach the lectern without disturbing the service.
Open: whether the parish lets a second person stand at or beside the lectern (settled by the pastor, who also sets how long the reflection may be and sees the text beforehand). If the pastor says no, the plan changes: Kofi sits in the front pew with his copy and comes up at her signal only if the pastor agrees.
Free pages that show the parts of this chapter: the NHS breathing exercise page (the method in plain steps), Stand Up, Speak Out on the unexpected (losing your place, tech failures, interruptions) and NorthShore's eulogy guide (a hospice chaplaincy's plan for tears).
Practice: your first minute and your plan B Practice
Minimum: your first line written, your lost-your-place plan written, and one five-minute breathing practice done. Time: about 40 minutes, spread over a few days. Materials: your cards or script, a pen in a second color, water, a timer, and the day-of checklist.
- Write your first line in full at the top of the first card, and a cue such as "slow down" or "pause" in the second color beside it.
- Write your lost-your-place plan as three short verbs ("pause, look down, find the keyword") on the day-of checklist.
- Practice the breathing exercise for five minutes, once a day for a few days, using the NHS description above. Notice the day you feel most steady.
- Rehearse the plan on purpose. In a run-through, stop mid-sentence, take a breath, look at the card and restart from the nearest keyword. Do it three times. Practice recovering as well as practicing the talk.
- Write what you will do for each other problem that worries you (screen fails, interruption, running long) in one line each, from the table above.
Try the excitement label once. In one rehearsal, say aloud "I am excited" before you begin, and note in the rehearsal sheet how you felt compared with a run-through where you did not. It is one trial on one person, and it tests only how you feel.
Your talk Your talk
Check your work Check your work
Criteria
- Is your first line written in full, at the top of the first card?
- Have you practiced the breathing exercise on at least a few ordinary days, not only on the day?
- Does your lost-your-place plan say what to do, in a few words you can read at a glance?
- For each problem that worries you, is there one written line saying what you will do?
- If you may cry, is there a named person with a copy, and have you told them the signal?
- Do you know whether your nerves fit "common before a talk," or whether any of the signs in when fear is more than nerves apply?
Worked example
Lena's day-of checklist has her first line written in full at the top of card one, her close ("Please join me in raising a glass to Grandma Ruth") on the last card; her lost-your-place plan ("pause, card, keyword"); water on the table; and a time mark at the end of the story. It passes. It does not settle whether her voice will catch or whether the pause will read well, and the example says so.
Common mistakes
- Planning to "just stay calm." Brooks's study found that most people believe calming down is the best method. Plan an action instead.
- Having the plan in your head only. Under nerves, a plan not written down is hard to find.
- Treating a drink as a nerve plan. One study found calmer feelings and worse ratings.
- Naming a backup reader but not giving them the script. Hand over a copy marked at the breaks.
- Rehearsing only the talk. Practice the recovery too.
- Reading the 29.0 percent, the one third and the 7.1 percent as one number. They measure different things.
What is still unresolved
How you personally respond to nerves is settled only by trying methods in rehearsal; Rehearsing out loud gives the runs. Whether a service lets someone stand beside you is for the officiant (Tributes and eulogies). Whether fear of speaking has become a condition is for a doctor or a mental health professional. The sound and the room are in Voice, microphone and the room, and the morning-of list is on the day-of checklist.