Material and names
The stories and facts people gave you, who told you each, who checked it and whether you keep it; and every name you will say, with how its owner says it.
Essential on a first pass when your talk rests on stories or facts other people gave you, or when you will say a name aloud that you are not sure of: a toast about someone, an introduction, a tribute or eulogy. Optional for a talk built only on your own experience, with no unfamiliar names. A reader who skips it risks a story told without its owner's agreement or a name said wrongly. Finding what to say explains both tables.
Stories, details and facts
One row per story, detail or fact. Write who told you, who checked it, and whether it stays. The example rows are fictional.
Names
One row per name you will say aloud. Write it as you will say it, with the stressed syllable in capitals, and tick the box only when its owner has said it for you. The example rows are fictional.
How to use this sheet
- One row per story, detail or fact. Write it in a line, then who told you, then who checked it. "Checked with" is the person who would know whether it is right or whether it may be told: the person it is about, or the family.
- The Use column is a decision. Keep, Maybe or Cut. Everything else in the row is an observation. Choose Keep only for the stories that show your main point; Maybe means you are waiting on an answer.
- One row per name. Write the name as printed, then how you will say it: a respelling with the stressed syllable in capitals and syllables separated, as a university commencement office (Missouri S&T) asks of the names it reads. This is our adaptation of that method, not a standard.
- Tick "Checked with the person" only when its owner has said the name for you, in a call, a message or a recording. A guess from the spelling leaves the box empty.
- Title or how they want to be addressed is theirs to say: Dr., a first name, a nickname the family uses.
The starter rows come from Amara Osei's case: a eulogy for her father, Kwame Osei (he/him), at a funeral Mass. The napkin story, about him driving to every one of her games and keeping the score on a napkin, came from her brother Kofi Osei (he/him) and was checked with their mother. It is marked Keep because it shows how he showed up. The dominoes story came from a neighbor and has no one checking it yet, so it is marked Maybe: ask the family first, because it may suit the reception better than the Mass. In the names table, Kwame Osei's respelling is ticked because his widow confirmed it. A second row, for a minor fictional guest named Dr. Nandini Rao, is unticked: her office has not yet said how she wants it said.
This sheet records what people told you. It cannot tell you whether a story is true, whether the person it concerns is comfortable with it, or whether the occasion welcomes it; the people involved and the family settle that, and the Checked with column is where you write who did. A respelling is only as good as the person who gave it. If someone corrects you on the day, their version replaces yours.